When people see me, I am talking. I travel the world, speaking to one group after another about Jesus, church growth, Christian Evidences, etc. I preach all three morning services at Rochester Church as well as our Wednesday night gathering — Connections — and lead a small group every Monday night. Some of my sermons are “stand and deliver” but most of them involve humor, movement, sight gags, or props that help (I hope) make a point, or make the point more memorable.

Put me at a home gathering and people expect me to talk. I tell stories, discuss religion and politics, encourage others in their journey, and even solve a problem or two. In other words… I’m always talking. Perhaps that is why people can’t believe that I don’t talk much at home. In fact, in any place or time when I am not “on” — not working, in other words, I rarely speak.

My wife is the same. She speaks extensively in the course of her daily business. She is very sociable (on a scale of 1 to 10, she is a 7 and I am a 3), sharp, and interacts with contractors, suppliers, clients, and church people from early morning to, often, late at night. However, when she isn’t working, she is quiet. Like me.

We discussed this tonight at a party where our elders and staff gathered (Rochester Church has a staff and eldership that adore and respect each other. It is truly unique and wonderful) and many had a very hard time accepting it. They couldn’t imagine us quiet! Fact is, we’ve now been home an hour and a half and have spoken perhaps a dozen words — total — between us. Are we angry? Do we not love each other? Are you kidding me??? We adore each other. As one of the elder’s wives said, “Patrick, everybody knows, and there is no doubt, where your heart is” as she pointed to Kami. We just smiled.

In our basement, fixed up as a relaxing place for the whole family, Kami works at her desk, or reads a book on the couch as I read in my chair. Maybe we’ll watch a movie or a favorite TV show (“Lost”, “24″, “House” or “The Unit”). Every day, at least for a half hour, usually more, I’ll play one of my guitars or other instrument. Sometimes she will sew or she’ll putter here and there around the place.

We are perfectly content, perfectly happy, and almost perfectly quiet. Our quietness is a gentle dance, parallel play, without words… peace. Not 2 out of 10 of those who know us would believe it… maybe even after seeing it.

I know good pray-ers. They can go on for an hour or two with powerful prayers that send chills up and down my spine and truly communicate with their Father in the throne room of heaven. They can’t stop talking about God, reading about God, singing about God. I admire them. They are jewels in the kingdom, treasures that make us all better people.

But I’m not one of them. When I walk off the Rochester Church stage and get into my car to drive away, I rarely speak, even in prayer. Oh, I pray — dozens of times a day, but they are one or two sentence prayers, very similar in length to the phrases and sentences I use in speaking with my beloved wife. I think God understands. I imagine he enjoys watching me fumble around on the guitar, play a game with my son, laughing at “Nacho Libre” or some other silliness. I know I enjoy being His, belonging to Him, and loving Him as I go through my day. I may not be very verbal. Okay, okay, I am one of His least verbal children… but He knows I love Him. He knows that, in my basement room, my sanctuary, I see the books, TV, desks, instruments, and my wife and son and realize I am really seeing evidence of God; the presence of God in my life. And I am in His, even though we don’t talk very much. The way my wife and I love each other isn’t that super intense, always engaged, mega-conversational way portrayed in movies and bodice ripping romance novels. And the way I love God (and feel His love in return) isn’t that overwhelming, pounding, passionate way I hear others say He deals with them.

That’s okay. My life is a journey, a narrative, and series of vignettes and scenes full of wonder, quiet, and play. And God is right there in the same room. And it is good.